Most of them made by tom himself!
Whats the difference between Torres' career and Torres' hair?
A. His hair has highlights!
Whats the difference between a refferee and a united fan?
A. Not much , they both want Man united to win every game!
It’ll be nice for Emile when he weds Chantelle Tagoe. It’ll make a change to hear “Mrs Heskey” instead of “Heskey misses”.
Emile plans to open a pub when he retires – because he’s great at putting shots over the bar.
Robert Green faced over 100 shots in training today without conceding a goal. Tomorrow, he and Heskey will train with the rest of the squad.
Carroll 'I've just had a good idea for strengthening the team.'
Dalglish : `Good! When are you leaving?'
Man United have today released their new kit Black shirts black shorts black socks and a whistle.
A poor old Arsenal fan!
They say that pessimists see the cup as half empty, and optimists as half full
My team haven't even seen the cup !
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